Big Sister

Today is my sisters 29th Birthday. It's crazy how time flies by. I can't believe it has been three years and some months since you have been gone. I honestly never talked about you that much to anyone. I was scared too. I held a lot of my feelings, pain, and sorrow in about you for quite some time, actually till just recently. It made me upset to think about it and open up about it because I had many regrets when you left. I never really got to ever know my big sister, except for those few months that you were back home. I never told you I loved you as much as I should have and wanted too. I never talk to you just you and I besides a few times and I remember those days very vividly. And honestly I didn't spend all that much time with you. Sure yeah some of it had to do with the gap of years between us so it was hard but I still wanted wish we could have. If I could play it back I would have done things very differently, but I can't and I have finally accepted that. But even though we didn't see much of each other all the time or see eye to eye quite a bit of the time, I always knew you loved me more than anything in the world. You always protected me and anyone in our family from anything and everything. If you didn't a approve of a girl I was seeing or she wasn't treating me how you thought I should be treated you made sure she knew that and that if they did anything to hurt me that you were going to hunt them down. You protected me, cared about me, and loved me throughout my whole life and I knew that always. No words had to be said, no actions had to be done...I just knew it. And I thank you so much for that and I love you more than you could ever know.

Now Tash was always the most outgoing and opinionated person I have ever met. She could go into pretty much anywhere and within 10 or 15min that she was there mostly everyone has put their eyes on her to see what she would do next or say next. You had an energy about her that was unreal. It made everyone around her feel more comfortable and make them get out of their shy little box and be more outgoing because you weren't afraid cause you could never out do her. Tash wasn't the most warming person if you didn't really know her, but you always respected her and loved something about her because she was so unique in many ways. She was a very passionate and ambitious woman that if she went after something she would get it. If she wanted something done it would get done and done very well. She inspired me and gave me my passion for the entertainment business that I am forever grateful for because it makes me very happy to love something that I do, and she made that happen. Tasha put up quite a bit of bark and talked a lot. But behind that hard front she had she was one of the sweetest and very family oriented girl. She loved to be with her family and friends. You could just tell she was truly happy when she was around people that she cared about and people that cared about her.

I could go on for days describing her and what she meant to me and who I thought she was. The bottom line is that she was one of the most amazing woman I have ever seen. Sure she was hard to get a long with and very tough to deal with at times but she had that quality about her that attracted people regardless because you knew behind that tough act she had on she was one of the most caring, loving, and passionate people you could ever know. I couldn't ask for a better sister than her and what she did for me that I didn't understand at the time. I love you Tasha and I miss you every day. Thank you for being my amazing big sister!