Heartbreak or Beginning.

I have experienced something I have never really experience in my life. Breaking up with someone you love with all your heart. Yeah girlfriends and boyfriends break up all the time. But when you break up with someone you have been with for so long and someone you truly love it is very different. It's like you're almost lost in the world without them. You don't want to let them go. It makes you either want them more and you know your feelings are very true about that person or it does the complete opposite and you know that person was not really the one. But the unique thing about this break up was all of the history. I haven't been with someone that has been there through the toughest times in my life like her. She was there for me when my sister was battling cancer and lost. She was there for me when I lost my dad. And she has been there for me through pretty much losing connection with all the rest of my extended family. That is a lot for a couple to handle and to go through at such a young age and short amount of time. Most people don't go through all of that shit in a life time and that all happened in a matter of a short three years. That takes a lot on a relationship, especially since when we started our amazing relationship, and then a few months later it my sister was battling cancer. We didn't really have much time to have a relationship just about us. We had a few months to be all about each other and then I think we never had a second to breath after that. There is very few things I would have done differently given all the circumstances. But it does take a toll on a relationship that never really had a chance to be about us. Most people have a good year or so that you are getting to know that person and always with them and always wanting to be with them and all of that good stuff. Well we had that just in a different way. But this might be the best thing for a relationship or it could be the worst. I guess you have to leave that up in Gods hands. It can give you an opportunity to start your relationship over fresh and begin again. Like a couple just getting together and knowing each other and being madly in love and always wanting to be together and talking about one another. Getting to know the fun little details about each other and fun things about one another. But also having a past and knowing a lot about the person and what they have been through. Or you realize through this break up that you were staying with that one person because of everything you have been through with that one person and you are better off as really good friends. I guess it's up to us to decide.